Fred Mercy

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9:48am: It's not clear to me whether long stretches of time without a blog entry is a sign of better mental health than posting an entry every day; on the one hand, not writing a lot means my mind is occupied with something else and I have no urge to write. On the other hand, it could also be revealing how unproductive and lazy I've become?

I feel a constant pull towards creativity as an escape from normal life. Yet somehow normal life captures me and enslaves me, keeps me fed with a terrible diet of worldnews and Netflix binge watching.

Question is: have I changed, or has the world changed? Or have I failed to change with the world? These days, there's too much nonsense, too much information, too much noise...

“2019 is the "all-in" year for me” that's what I told myself at the start of this year. It's already fucking August! and I haven't yet bluffed my way into getting more chips. And enough with the poker analogies already! Fuck! Look, I don't know what's gonna happen with me, but something's gotta happen. I gotta do something. Or maybe I should just chill out.

10:05am: And sometimes I end up finding artists that really inspire me to get out there and just create shit, just get into that flow state and make shit. Last week, I watched the compiled Part 1 of an animation project by "u m a m i" on YouTube; it's called "Interface" and it's absolutely bonkers, mate. Not only is the animation style funny and fantastic and deliciously lofi, but the sound design and music and voiceover work is excellent, too! The story isn't super clear to me because I'm a bit dumb, and also I was high as fuck when I watched it the first time, but there's an atmosphere that really captured me. Check it out!

Also recently watched Akira (1988) and The Neon Demon (2016), which means I've got my fill of messed up movies... for the month, maybe. I love messed up movies, though.

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last updated: 2021-03-24 @ 11:45pm

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